People in other countries sometimes go out of their way to communicate with their English-speaking tourists. It is not so much the words they use, but how they put them together. Here is a list of signs seen around the world:
Cocktail lounge, Norway:LADIES ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE BAR.
Doctors office, Rome:SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES.
Hotel, Acapulco:THE MANAGER HAS PERSONALLY PASSED ALL THE WATER SERVED HERE.
Sign in men's rest room in Japan:TO STOP LEAK, TURN COCK TO THE RIGHT
In a Nairobi restaurant:CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE OUGHT TO SEE THE MANAGER.
On the grounds of a private school:NO TRESPASSING WITHOUT PERMISSION.
On an Athi River highway:TAKE NOTICE: WHEN THIS SIGN IS UNDER WATER, THIS ROAD IS IMPASSABLE.
On a poster at Kencom:ARE YOU AN ADULT THAT CANNOT READ? IF SO, WE CAN HELP.
In a City restaurant:OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK, AND WEEKENDS TOO.
In a Pumwani maternity ward:NO CHILDREN ALLOWED.
In a cemetery:PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS FROM ANY BUT THEIR OWNGRAVES.
Sign in Japanese public bath:FOREIGN GUESTS ARE REQUESTED NOT TO PULL COCK IN TUB.
Tokyo hotel's rules and regulations:GUESTS ARE REQUESTED NOT TO SMOKE OR DO OTHER DISGUSTING BEHAVIOURS IN BED.
On the menu of a Swiss restaurant:OUR WINES LEAVE YOU NOTHING TO HOPE FOR.
In a Tokyo bar:SPECIAL COCKTAILS FOR THE LADIES WITH NUTS.
In a Bangkok temple:IT IS FORBIDDEN TO ENTER A WOMAN EVEN A FOREIGNER DRESSED AS A MAN.
Hotel room notice,Chiang-Mai, Thailand:PLEASE DO NOT BRING SOLICITORS INTO YOUR ROOM.
Hotel, Japan:YOU ARE INVITED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE CHAMBERMAID.
In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery:YOU ARE WELCOME TO VISIT THE CEMETERY WHERE FAMOUS RUSSIAN AND SOVIETCOMPOSERS, ARTISTS, AND WRITERS ARE BURIED DAILY EXCEPT THURSDAY.
Supermarket, Hong Kong:FOR YOUR CONVENIENCE,WE RECOMMEND COURTEOUS, EFFICIENT SELF-SERVICE.
Hotel, Zurich:BECAUSE OF THE IMPROPRIETY OF ENTERTAINING GUESTS OF THE OPPOSITE SEX IN THE BEDROOM, IT IS SUGGESTED THAT THE LOBBY BE USED FOR THISPURPOSE.
An advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist:TEETH EXTRACTED BY THE LATEST METHODISTS.
A laundry in Rome:LADIES, LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE AND SPEND THE AFTERNOON HAVING A GOOD TIME.
Advertisement for donkey rides, Thailand:WOULD YOU LIKE TO RIDE ON YOUR OWN ASS?
The box of a clockwork toy made in Hong Kong:GUARANTEED TO WORK THROUGHOUT ITS USEFUL LIFE.
In a Swiss mountain inn:SPECIAL TODAY - NO ICE-CREAM.
Airline ticket office, Copenhagen:WE TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL DIRECTIONS
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